Thursday, April 16, 2015

Undeserved Grace

When we traveled to China, we did it with a great deal of financial freedom.  Hannah's adoption was financially feasible because of so many of you.  We cannot tell you the countless number of people who simply mailed us a check--some of you people we haven't spoken to in years or even met face to face.  Each day I would walk to the mailbox and just know that with the turn of my key in the door, I'd open it to be smacked with more of God's goodness.  It was really a lot of fun to see Him show up like that--each and every day.  It was also incredibly humbling, especially knowing there were many sacrifices made on the opposite end of all those checks.  I don't know if many of you know this, but we were able to adopt Hannah debt free.  What a glorious testimony to God's goodness to us.

We received three grants--one from each organization we applied to (Show Hope, Lifesong, and the Love Does Foundation).  With each application laboriously submitted, we really didn't expect to get anything.  Yet we did.  A lot.  Those grants pushed us over the edge and allowed us to have the cash we needed to wire to China, right at the final and most pivotal of moments.  People mailed us checks.  People handed us cash.  Anonymous friends sent envelopes loaded with cash.  Adoption is not cheap and we knew it was going to be a huge financial mountain to climb when we stepped out in faith and said "yes" to Hannah, but we knew that God would see us through.  And He did.  In so many countless ways.

When we got home, we expected this to stop.  The checks to stop coming.  The flood of His presence to stop pouring in through our mailbox.  But it hasn't.  Maybe it has even been a bit more humbling, since our adoption of Hannah is final.  Since coming home we've had yet more people step out in faith to support us.  People have sent gift cards for groceries, gift cards for meals out at local restaurants, gifts for the older children, gifts for Hannah, and even an entire box packed to the brim of things to take care of Mama to help me keep my energy and focus on fighting for this little person's heart each day.  An anonymous gift was given to our family that completely covered the cost of our insurance deductible (a wonderful blessing to have as we approach Hannah's first surgery).  We....are....floored.  And so humbled.  And in all of this there is the undercurrent from Chris and I.  Each time something happens we say, "But why us?  Why are people being so undeniably generous and kind to us?  We are sinners!  We fail!  We don't serve as much as we wish to!"  Yet, there it is.  These gifts.  These powerful, tangible pieces of evidence of God's goodness to us.

Truth is, we don't deserve any of it.  Not one iota.  None of us do.  We do not deserve the grace that has been extended to us.  What a gorgeous picture of the gospel all of this has been in our lives, in the lives of our children, and in the lives of those around us.  What I can tell you is that we have been forever changed by it.  Our eyes have been opened anew and the passion in our hearts for the orphan stoked even more.  We will give differently because of you.  We will pray differently because of you.  Our children will give and pray differently because of you.  From the bottom of our hearts, thank you for being a part of this gospel journey with us.  It has truly been remarkable.

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